Dumb Jock

There are some dumb athletes out there. Immediately coming to mind is my boy Pedro Guerrero. Now Pete could swing it, a career 300 hitter, but he wasn't exactly Mensa material. He was also the worst slider I've ever seen in my life, never seen a guy nearly shatter his ankle so many times, but I digress. So after he retires, he's looking for something to do so he tries playing pepper with the kids, placing blown bubbles on his wife's head and giving the neighbors "hotfoots", but that gets old, so he does what any sensible person would do, he gets involved in drug trafficing. So being the genius he is, Pete tells an undercover agent that he would guarantee payment for $200K worth of coke. He's screwed right? WRONG! He gets acquitted of drug conspiracy charges, cause his lawyer argues that his IQ is so low he couldn't possible understand he agreed to the deal! We start find out crazy facts like Pete can't make his own bed or write a check. And he's so dumb that his wife has to give him a small weekly allowance. Dude has an IQ of 70...yeah...70!!!!!! Pete for many many years has stood triumphiantly atop my list of dumbest athletes. However the last week or so a couple young bucks have begun to challenge. And they are........

Fred Rouse, former WR, FSU
Guy got kicked off the FSU football team. That should be enough right there, cause thats DAMN hard to do. But he and a buddy decide to break into the house of current Nole Lorenzo Booker to steal a TV and other various knicknacks. He gets caught and arrested, of course, and has ecstasy on him, whoops! And this is the kicker, "among the items investigators found at Booker's home was a wide receivers glove with "1," Rouse's former jersey number, stitched into the inside of it. The glove had been left under a color television that had been thrown onto the floor."

AJ Nicholson, LB, Bengals
So who was Rouse's buddy? None other than AJ, who recently was drafted. You can't afford a TV after you just got drafted??? You are a professional athlete!!! Yikes! AJ has had some other recent brain farts including raping a woman in Miami before the Orange Bowl...allegedly. In college he once had to be subdued by cops with a taser when he was drunk and hiding in the bushes. Thats pretty funny AJ, you and Chris Henry will get along great.

While these 2 contenders are undoubtedly dumb jocks, they are no Pete Guerrero, merely wannabes. But keep up the work Rouse and AJ, don't quit dreaming! Congrats Pete, you are still the man!